Questions to Consider Asking a Home Health Care Agency

Questions to Ask a Home Health Care Agency

DISCLAIMER: I am NOT a lawyer or insurance professional. Please check the local laws and regulations in your state.

We've had a home health care aide for my child with special needs for roughly 10 months. We located an agency through a list of state -approved providers. However, some of the caregivers they sent were completely unsatisfactory. For instance, one casually mentioned during a family dinner that her own family had called child protective services on her several times.

Another time an frail woman who appeared to be about 70 showed up. I was afraid she'd fall and break a hip! I ended up making her tea and letting her watch TV until the end of her shift. In my opinion, she couldn't handle the physical challenge of working with a 125 pound, autistic and mobility impaired person.

I finally discovered that the agency (which was approved by my state Medicaid) hired through Craigslist. Applicants were required to pay for their own background checks, but were allowed to start assignments before providing the agency with the results.

The agency was hiring them as independent contractors. These individuals had no worker's compensation insurance. Several told me that they had no personal health insurance. What would have happened if they were hurt on the job in my house? Most likely we would have been sued.

When I contacted the home health care agency I asked about these issues (none of which they refuted.) I also asked if they had any general liability insurance in case my child was injured by one of the people they sent to our home. The answer was that the business was insured, but the coverage only extended to their physical place of business (the office.) If my child was hurt or abused by someone they sent over I would be free to sue the individual involved!

These practices put both my family and the caregiver at risk. I had to ask the state to help me locate a more suitable agency. Rest assured that I asked A LOT of questions before I agreed to a new agency!

So, as a precaution to others I've compiled the following list of questions.

If you have a home health care or home care worker in your home, consider asking the agency* the following questions:

Are the workers you send to my home employees or independent contractors? This is important because the agency isn’t paying payroll taxes on independent contractors – including worker’s compensation insurance.

If an independent contractor is hurt on the job in your home or driving on your business you can be sued for medical costs and lost wages. Do not rely on Homeowners Insurance coverage to protect you, unless the insurance carrier has confirmed coverage for this risk. Many insurance companies have specific riders that can be added – at a cost- to cover in-home caregivers

Does the agency have general liability insurance?
In the event that your child or family member is injured while being cared for by an employee of the agency does the agency have coverage to pay for related medical expenses? Ask to see the documentation.

Does the agency have theft insurance?
Have employees been bonded? In the unfortunate case of theft by a caregiver is there insurance coverage to help you recover financially?  Ask to see the documentation.

Has the applicant had a criminal background check, drug screen and employment (not personal) references contacted?
Just because caregiver is provided by an agency or registry doesn’t mean that adequate screening has occurred. A number of smaller agencies recruit though Craigslist. Applicants may or not have been interviewed in person. 

Is the worker First Aid/CPR certified?
Tell the agency what your specific needs are. Don't assume that the worker will know how to operate your equipment, assist with transfers, etc.

Ask things such as: Has the caregiver had any specialized training (familiarity with equipment/supplies, received training in a specific illness, etc.)?  Are they capable of meeting any lifting requirements?

Does the caregiver have adequate auto insurance coverage?
If not, and the caregiver gets in a car accident in the course of running errands on your behalf, then you may be held liable for the damages caused by the caregiver.

 *If you hire an in-home caregiver yourself ensure that you have similar coverage!

If you hire a home care worker privately, you are not required to provide workers compensation (unless they are being paid through a funded program such as CCSP/PSS in Georgia.)

Like any employer, you must abide by the applicable disclosure and authorization provisions if you elect to perform a background check. You should only have a background check conducted by a professional third party. Do not attempt to do it yourself. If you elect to have a background check done be sure to adhere to all legal requirements regarding privacy and disclosure.

If you are hiring the worker privately be sure to have clear job guidelines including specific lifting requirements and safety precautions.

If the worker is injured lifting your family member, slips in a wet bathroom, etc. are you prepared for the financial costs of covering their lost wages and medical costs? What if they sue you – do you have an umbrella policy on your homeowners insurance that will protect you?

What if you are robbed by them? Will your insurance cover the damages?

If they injure your family member are you equipped to handle the related medical costs?

Be sure the worker knows what is expected of them while on the job in your home and that you have made your home safe for both the caregiver and your family member.

DISCLAIMER: I am NOT a lawyer or insurance professional. Please check the local laws and regulations in your state.

Can I Get the Disney Dining Plan if I'm not staying at a Disney Resort?

Disney Dining Plan

You've probably heard a lot about the Disney Dining Plan. Maybe you know someone who has been to Disney World with the Dining Plan and come back raving about it. You, however, are staying with friends or relatives, so you have to ask,"Can I get the Disney Dining Plan if I'm staying somewhere else?"

In a word, NO. According to the official Walt Disney World website, "Disney dining plans are options available exclusively to Guests of select Walt Disney World Resort hotels with Magic Your Way Vacation Packages."

There are pros and cons to this,my friend.

Con: Most people with the Dining Plan try to maximize their table service credits by using them for the most expensive meals available - dinners and Character Meals as well as Signature Meals & Dinner Shows. What this means for you if you aren't on a Dining Plan: Dinner reservations at any Character Meal or well-known Table Service restaurant are going to be very hard to come by. (Trust me, I've been in your shoes & tried.)

Pro: This frees up reservations at great restaurants for lunch! Character breakfasts and lunches are also fairly easy to get. And, even better for you - these are the least expensive restaurant meals.

We had no problems getting reservations at the Princess Breakfast at Akershus and lunch at Sanaa on short notice. Check out the menus - lunch & dinner entrees are often very similar so you won't be missing out on the famed specialities of the house. You'll just be getting them at a lower price.

Nine Dragons

Another upside - anyone with the Dining Plan probably wants to use their Counter/Quick service or Snack credits for lunch. You avoid the crowds at these places if you chose a Table Service restaurant for lunch. No waiting in long lines with hungry kids at lunchtime. And you get to eat in air conditioned comfort! We walked into Nine Dragons at EPCOT and were seated immediately for lunch.

Pro: At dinner the opposite is true. Many people are eating at table service restaurants so you can eat at the less expensive (and less crowded) Counter & Quick Service Restaurants without long lines. And that means you have more time for rides in the cooler evening hours!

Con: You have to budget for your meals and pay for them every day. It can be hard to look at a $150 bill for a Character breakfast. Paying for the combined package removes some of the sticker shock. It's a bit like removing a band aid - you just rip it off and are done.

Sunshine Seasons

I know - you're worried that not having the Dining Plan may cost you more money and one of your goals to staying off property was to save a little money. Here's my comparison:

OPTION A: STAYING AT A DISNEY REOSRT
Right now (May 2012) the estimate for a 6 night stay in a Family Suite at the Disney All Star Music Resort with Magic Your Way Plus Dining was roughly $4,500 (not including taxes) for our family of four (2 adults, 1 junior, 1 child). The costs will vary somewhat according to the ages of your children. Kids under 3 are free (but don't get any meal credits). Children 10 and over are counted as adults and priced accordingly.

There are undoubtedly a few incidental expenses even with the Magic Your Way package. For instance, alcoholic and speciality drinks as well as most photo packages aren't included in the Dining Plan. Somehow, I bet most people end up paying for a few extras even if they are on the Dining Plan.

Sushi at the Kona Cafe

Tips aren't included in the price of the Dining Plan package. After a meal the receipt will show the credits someone on the Dining Plan used for that meal as well as "Guest ID" which is "Gratuity and other charges not covered by the Disney Dining Plan, charged to room." Most bills include a small card describing the suggested gratuity - typically 18-20%. Let's say the parents each order one alcoholic drink per dinner at $8-10 per glass. For a family like ours tips & drinks over 6 nights would add about $175-250 to the cost of dining. So the total is probably over $5,000 for the trip when you include taxes.

Staying at a Disney Resort gives you lots of amenities - a beautiful lobby and pools, on site restaurants and shops, proximity to parks or park transportation. You also get special services like delivery of any park purchases to your resort so you don't have to carry bags all day or worry about your souvenirs being stolen. You can use the Disney Magic Express so you don't even have to rent a car if you fly. And, of course, you can take advantage of the Extra Magic Hours that allow you to arrive early or stay late at a particular park.

Personally, I love the idea of a Magic Your Way plus Dining Plan. Its essentially an "all inclusive" option for your vacation. You don't have to worry about pulling out your wallet as many times during the day. You can focus on finding the ultimate souvenir without concern about maxing out your credit card. You don't have to cook, wash dishes or make your own beds. If you enjoy eating out and can eat the amount of food served at a Disney dinner then you are probably getting your money's worth.

Sanaa

OPTION B: STAYING IN A RENTAL HOUSE
We rented a three bedroom house with a private pool for $805 for six nights (not including taxes). We have to pay for our Park tickets separately ($1,049) so we're up to approximately $2,000 with taxes. If you are staying off property you probably plan on eating a few meals wherever you are already. We will eat one meal a day at the house - probably breakfast, but it might be dinner. The question is can we eat, drive and park for less than the $2,500+ difference?

Parking was $14 a day. You only have to pay once per day - just hold on to your receipt. So for 6 days estimate $84. Assume $150 for groceries and another $150 for gas. Our main meals tend to be lunches - which average about half of what dinners cost. Assume we spend $400 on table service meals - and another $250 on quick service meals and snacks. I estimate our total meal & parking costs to be about $1,000. Our grand total comes to roughly $3,000. We have to expend more effort driving, parking, etc. but we save about $2,000 by staying off property and paying for meals a la carte. That's almost enough for another trip!

So, ask yourself which is more important for the trip YOU are planning - saving money or immersing yourself in all that is Disney?

Front hall - rental house

The "DIS" in Disney isn't for discount

Let's face it - even a budget a trip to Walt Disney World is pricey. You can rent a house or stay in a hotel. Cook meals in, eat out off site or eat on Disney property. You can juggle your costs, but its still thousands of dollars by the time you're done.

No matter what you do tickes are almost impossible to find at a discount. For several years Disney offered a free day in exchange for a day of volunteerism or on an individual's birthday. What a great advertising campaign! Almost everyone would love a free day at Walt Disney World... at least on paper. In reality these were not great savings to the individual as Disney only discounted value of the lowest cost day - not the value of the most expensive day (the first day). So, on a 7 day ticket you saved about $8.00.

In all fairness, if Disney gave away 1,000,000 of these days then they lost $8,000,000 in potential revenue (or more if people only went for 1 day to maximize the value.) However, each of those people undoubtedly ate something at a park, picked up a souvenir or two... Disney made back their money, I'm sure.

Assuming I've done the math correctly, here are my findings regarding ticket prices on a 7 day ticket for 3 adults & 1 child without park hopper (as of April 29, 2012):

UNDERCOVER TOURIST $1,024.00+ tax & shipping included= TOTAL $1,024.00

Kissimmee Guest Services with promo code  $1,017.53  +7% tax $10.00 shipping =TOTAL  $1,098.76

DIS website  $1,049.00 +7% tax +Must pick up tickets at a Disney will call window= TOTAL $1,122.43

Disney Store in GA $1,049.00 +7% tax+take from store = TOTAL $1,122.43

Kissimmee Guest Services no code $1,049.00+ 7% tax+ $10.00 shipping = TOTAL $1,132.43

Walt Disney World online site $1,049.00 +7% tax+ $15.00 shipping= TOTAL  $1,137.43


The best deal was from Undercover Tourist - a total of $113.43 savings from the Walt Disney World site. That's a pretty nice meal somewhere while you're on vacation.

My Disney Essentials Kit

My friends all think I'm a little silly with my Disney preparations. I can't help myself! I love Disney and getting ready for the trip is all part of the fun as far as I'm concerned.

This year I'm lucky enough to have a friend who will be traveling to Disney World at the same time that we are. We're not traveling together or staying together - our trips just happened to overlap. So, naturally, I felt compelled to include her in my Disney planning. Consider it a little pixie dust...

I made us each a Disney Essentials kit. These kits contain small items that I've found helpful while visiting Walt Disney World parks. Everyone has a different idea of what is absolutely essential and what is overkill. There are a lot of things I could have included in these mini-kits, but didn't for cost or space reasons. I was able to pick up must of these items with a quick trip to WalMart and DollarTree. The small items fit easily into a purse or backpack. Each "kit" cost about $10 to put together.

Here's what I put into each:

• Sunscreen Stick
• Mickey Mouse Band Aids
• Crystal Essence deodorant wipes (let's face it, the most magical place on Earth is also one of the sweatiest places on Earth)
• SafetyTats & a Sharpie pen in case a child wanders off...
• Eco friendly labels for cups, etc.
• Personal battery operated fan
• Tiny bottle of bubbles for waiting in lines (combine with the personal fan for real magic!)
• Individual packets of powdered drink mix (to add to free cups of ice water available at any quick or counter service restaurant)
• Glow sticks, bracelets, etc. for nighttime parades
• Wet wipes
• Hand sanitizer 

Spring Break Atlanta Stay-cation

Spring Break Atlanta Stay-cation

We're staying home during Spring Break this year. Mainly because the one time we went away for the week of Spring Break the return traffic (from Florida to Atlanta) was insane - the trip home took 3 hours longer than the trip down. I know it's not a novel idea. As a child we never went anywhere for school breaks. I think sometimes as parents we feel that we "have" to make vacations special. The beauty of this plan is that it is special. It allows late mornings, lazy afternoons laying the grass looking at the clouds, ball games in the yard and al fresco dinners on our back deck. So relaxing!

I researched all sorts of things to do within an hour of our home, a suburb north of Atlanta. I debated some farther trips - like Chattanooga, TN but discarded the idea. I found plenty of free or low cost activities within an hour of home. Some of the things we did were every day things. We went to the local mall and had soft pretzels and ice cream cones. We window shopped, watched videos in the Disney Store and rode the carousel. Total cost about $20. One afternoon we went swimming at our local YMCA.

We have are lucky enough to have two nice nature centers close to home- Autrey Mill Preserve and Chattachoochee Nature Center. Located on 46 acres of ravine forest Autrey Mill is FREE to explore the historic homes and nature paths.  The Visitor Center is accessible and houses several tanks of snakes, lizards and frogs. Outside there are ducks. For a small donation you can get a cup of duck feed and the ducks will adore you. None of the historic homes or trails are wheelchair accessible but its a fun place to spend an hour - longer if you aren't mobility impaired. Some of the trails lead to a replicas of a Native American lodge and tee pee as well as a beautiful stream. They offer a number of historical and nature programs for about $5.00/person.

Chattahoochee Nature Center offers several walking trails including a boardwalk path, animal encounters and a nice play area.They a licensed rehabilitation center for native raptors, mammals and reptiles so you can see more than 50 different species that were rehabilitated, but unable to be safely returned to the wild. Chattahoochee charges $8.00 per adult and $5.00 per child to visit. We were able to bring a wheelchair to the Nature Center and along the boardwalk. The remainder of the Center wasn't accessible. Still, a great afternoon for under $30.
 
Another great FREE Atlanta destination is the Fernbank Science Center which houses a small museum, a planetarium (cost $4/adults, $3 kids ) and on Thursday & Friday nights an observatory open to the public. It is all wheelchair accessible. Nearby is the FREE Fernbank Forest which has 1½ miles of paved trails through 65 acres relatively undisturbed forest in the middle of Atlanta. Fernbank Rose Garden is also FREE and a lovely place for a quiet walk.

Because we live outside of a major metropolitan area there are a number of large tourist attractions. Our big splurge was to get annual family memberships to three local attractions. All are withing about an hour of home and will pay for themselves in 2 visits. We joined Fernbank Museum (see my previous blog)-family Membership cost $95- and Zoo Atlanta - family membership cost $99 (you can get a $10 discount online).
 
Zoo Atlanta is fully paved with (for the most part) gradual slopes. The path between the Backyard Habitat and the Children's Zoo is extremely steep and I wouldn't recommend taking it if you are pushing a wheelchair or stroller. The rest of the park is easily accessible by wheelchair. However, disabled parking is very limited - causing many visitors to become pretty aggressive about getting a space. We tried to go this week but were beat out of a parking spot despite waiting and having our turn signal on. So much for Southern hospitality!

I love Zoo Atlanta, despite the difficult parking. It is a modern Zoo with roomy naturalistic habitats for the animals to enjoy. One of the best things about being a member is free admission to the 2 member nights offered each year. Its wonderful to explore the Zoo in the evenings. The animals are often more active as the temperatures are cooler. Members Only Nights also feature live entertainment and special animal encounters- which my girls love!

For the first time we also bought season passes to Stone Mountain Park. Stone Mountain is a truly weird place - its a gigantic monument dedicated to the fallen leaders of the Confederacy. The carving depicts Confederate President Jefferson Davis, General Robert E. Lee and Lt. General Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson. It is literally carved into the side of a mountain - the South's own answer to Mount Rushmore. Really - it's not my goal to glamorize the secession and all it stood for. The annual pass lets us explore the various park exhibits and rides like the SkyRide and Gesyer Towers anytime we want throughout the year.  Stone Mountain houses a petting zoo, has a petting zoo attached to the Antebellum Plantation and Farmyard attraction. The farmyard offers a live show with trained goats and sheep.

My goal in going to Stone Mountain is to desensitize Danielle to fireworks before we head to one of those overpriced theme parks later in the year. Stone Mountain has a lasershow most nights during school vacations and on weekends. Despite living in the area for 15 years, we've never been to the show. You don't have to join to see the show - its FREE, sort of. You still need to pay the $10 park admission (parking fee). You can bring your own chairs and blankets. I didn't know that when I joined...  

I would encourage everyone to follow our model if you can. Most areas have unique, fun local spots to explore. Consider searching for a nature center, a playhouse, a puppet theater or a local history or children's museum. For less than the cost of two days at a theme park we had a week of great experiences as well as opportunities for a year of family fun through our new memberships.

Not your average party...the Divorce Party

Divorce Party

I'm in NO WAY celebrating divorce. Personally, I have been happily married for well over 2 decades. However, I acknowledge that in some relationships divorce is the best solution for everyone involved.

I recently decided to throw a divorce party for a friend; not to trash her ex or focus on the past, but to help her transition into her new life and to celebrate her independence. Her friends all wanted to show their love and support, knowing that this was a difficult period in her life.

We didn't give her wedding shower-type gifts. Having been separated for more than a year she had already replaced the items she'd left with her ex - wine glasses, toaster oven, etc.

No, we did not give her tacky or trashy gifts - although a few gag gifts were included in the fun. I gave her a copy of The Paperbag Princess, a children's book with a very strong female protagonist. In the story "a prince is kidnapped by a dangerous dragon, and the dragon's breath burns up all the clothes in the palace. The princess who loves the prince can only find a paper bag to wear when she goes to rescue her love. Cleverly tricking the dragon, she enters the cave where the prince, still beautifully dressed, is held captive. Is true love rewarded? No! He at once complains she's "a disaster" badly dressed, dirty and all messed up. She replies that he is a fine and handsome prince--but completely useless. "And, in the end, they didn't marry." I think that marriage is wonderful - but it isn't always the happy ending. The story always continues...

Decorations weren't black or maudlin. There were no voodoo dolls. This wasn't a party about burying the past, but about embracing the future. We used silly cocktail napkins with phrases like "let's party - the prince can wait" and I Dream of Jeannie themed "I don't do the master thing any more".

We served plenty of wine and a cake with the words "Just Divorced" (chocolate, naturally).  The point we wanted to make is that we all supported her as she moved forward.  She had fun and hopefully it helped during a rough time.

This may have prove that I will use any excuse to throw a party...

The Make Over Take Over

Redoing just one room of your house is apparently impossible. Once you finish that room the one next to it looks shabby, old, dated.... voila! you end up with the make over take over.

Having finished the dining room remodel in a week for under $200 I was on a mission. I explored designs for bathrooms, bedrooms, family rooms, kitchens...  Even keeping our old kitchen cabinets new granite counters and appliances would cost at least $10,000- ouch! I decided to tackle the another room first.

Our TV room is a sunny yellow that I actually like despite its not being trendy. My biggest dilemma in the TV room is a problem I also face in the kitchen and living room - laminate cabinets and counter tops. Yuck. Dated, old and ugly all rolled into one. I never understood why the original owners went to the effort and expense of having built-ins made and then cheaped out halfway through. However, I can't exactly rip out the built in bookcases without a sledge hammer and a big commitment to doing something else in the space.

Since painting over the wallpaper worked so well in the dining room I decide to be bold and paint the laminate countertops in the TV room. Rustoleum sells a countertop refinishing kit for about $250. A good deal if I was planning on repainting all of the kitchen countertops, but a bit expensive for the two small sections in the TV room.

My method was inexpensive and quick, but probably won't work in a heavy use area such as a kitchen or bathroom. I read a lot of other blogs on how to paint countertops and decided that I was much too lazy for most methods. Giani makes a countertop paint kit designed to simulate granite. The results on the website are spectacular. However, I didn't want a countertop look - I wanted the look of a built-in bookcase.

I ultimately purchased a less expensive Rustoleum product, Countertop Coating, which promised to be "washable, moisture and chemical resistant against common household items. No primer needed for laminate surfaces!"  I honestly think the nice man in the video who said,"Trust me, you can do this stuff" is what ultimately sold me on this product. I had less than 20 square feet to paint. Even with the recommended two coats, a single quart would be enough. And, better yet, the manufacturer does not recommend a finish coat of polyurethane. Two coats and in theory I'd be done! It costs less than $20 and is tintable. While the lightest shade it comes in is Ivory, Tom at Home Depot reduced the tint by 75% and I ended up with a close match to the white paint on the wood bookshelves.

First I cleaned the surfaces, wiped them down with rubbing alcohol and gave them a quick sanding, then wiped with alcohol again. Then I taped around the edges - it took 10 minutes all together.

"BEFORE"

I bravely applied the first coat. It took about 15 minutes to paint the two small sections. By then the house smelled like someone had spilled about a gallon of nail polish remover! Time to open the doors and the windows - in early March. Brr! Why didn't I think of this last week when the weather was an unseasonable 70 degrees?

First coat - not feelin' the love yet...

I waited two hours and then applied a second coat. The key to getting a good finish is to use a very good quality roller intended for smooth surfaces. While I was waiting I posted the "before" picture on Facebook. I got a mixed review of the project. Some friends cheered me on, some thought I was plain crazy - others warned me that the stuff was toxic. Oops! Too late to turn back if it is.

The Rustoleum web site estimated that the labor would take 2 hours. Without the drying time I did my small areas in about half of that.

Am I ever going to remember to wear gloves?!?

Next I replaced the boring black drawer pulls with inexpensive brushed nickel ones. I selected an oval pull for the drawers and simple round knobs for the cabinet doors - another big change for roughly $15. Having read many, many design blogs and researched a number of web sites over the past weeks one snippet of style advice stuck with me. It was simply,"when choosing metals, chose any color BUT brass!" I replaced the dated brass ceiling fixture with a new brushed nickel fixture (2 for $17.99 at Lowe's).

Original drawer pull and knobs

Finally, I decided to try reusing things from other parts of the house since it had worked well in the dining room. First, I swapped the dark area rug for a lighter one that had been stored in the basement. The darker rug will probably end up under the kitchen table. Next, I switched the table lamps with ones from our bedroom.

The total make over took two days (including shopping) and cost less than $50. The other piece of salient design advice that I read was, "Remember, that anything you chose today will look as dated in 30 years as your Grandmother's 1970 avocado green refrigerator does now." Funny - and too true!

Not Your Average Under $10 Gift Ideas for 2011

With Black Friday approaching it's time to start thinking about holiday shopping. I have a huge holiday gift list - 37 people, not including the 4 under my own roof. I know, I know...the easiest way to save money at this time of year is to cut people off the list. I could; but I won't.

I also know the "cheapest" gift is home baked goods. I love to bake, but I typically avoid this gift. In the first place, it's labor intensive. Can you imagine baking 37 dozen cookies?!? That's 444 cookies, my friends.

In the second place, I think people aren't really considering the cost of the ingredients they use. A nice tin or box costs about $3 which I agree is inexpensive. However chocolate isn't cheap, neither is butter. A batch of cookies, depending on the type, probably costs $2-5 to bake plus the cost of the packaging.  It is a personal and heartfelt gift. I like the idea, but I need back up plans for this busy time of year.

Purchased food is always an option, assuming you know the recipient's personal tastes. For instance, I detest chutneys and jellies. If I received these as a gift they would go straight to the local food bank. I know other people who love these items.  Women assume that everyone loves chocolate, but my husband could take it or leave it. He'd rather get nuts or something salty. However most people have family or guests who will gladly eat up the things they pass along.

You can also buy plants, ornaments, small kitchen items....I like to receive cut flowers, but some folks are allergic. Plants are theoretically a longer lasting gift. Unless the recipient, like me, forgets to water them regularly.

A teacher once told me that she has an entire box of Christmas ornaments that her students had given her. While she treasured them she didn't use them on her tree - she's Jewish! 

Our babysitter said that her mom (a teacher at my daughter's elementary school) typically receives multiple dish towels and potholders which they turn around and donate to the local soup kitchen. Nice of them. but probably not what the givers intended.

When I searched for inexpensive gift ideas I came up with the predictable soaps, candles, candy, mugs, note papers and socks... If I could knit I might make socks or mittens. But I can't. Aloe infused socks are a possibilty for the dance teachers since their feet take a beating.

I like the idea of gifts that are both practical and whimsical or unique if possible. Here are some off the beaten track ideas that I've come up with. These are suggestions for adults. There are lots of toys and books for children that cost less than $10; you don't need my suggestions. And as far as I can tell all that teenagers want is cash and no matter how much you give them it won't be enough.

These could be stocking stuffers or inexpensive gifts. If you are considering ordering online ALWAYS search the site name and "free shipping code" before ordering. Shipping costs will push these items over the $10 limit. Order from Amazon and you can normally get free super saver shipping with a $25 purchase. If you register and shop through GoodShop a they will make a donation to the charity of your choice. Consider one of these:

•  Instead of another picture frame consider ordering a Cable photo holder from Amazon. Available in several colors. It's about 5 feet long and comes with 8 magnets.
•  How about a stapler that doesn't need staples? Try the Pencil Grip The Classics Staple Free Stapler, (less risky for the little ones). It will only attach 2-5 sheets of paper, but that should work fine for homework, tests, etc. Pier One also carries a panda staple-free stapler for $5.
• Try a variation on the traditional pen and pencil set - You can get a  Smencil and Smen (smelly pen) Set for $5. I've found these at Michael's, Target and other local stores.
• Colored mechanical pencils from Crate & Barrel are available online only for $8.95
• or Smencils - pencils that smell good and are made from recycled materials. You can get a pack of 5 for $7
• These Drumstick pencils   are a little pricey at $8 for a pair, but fun and still functional
• To go with the pencils how about a battery operated pencil sharpener? You can pick one up at most grocery stores for about $4.
• A box of tea bags is okay - a tea infuser stick is cool if the person uses loose tea. There are several brands to chose from. I liked the Crate & Barrel model because it pulls apart rather than hinges so it is easier to use and clean.
•  If you know the person's hobbies you can go for a themed gift. Pier One sells a trio of golf club shaped pens for $5. You can get sports team playing cards for $7 if the person is a fan. (I had to chose NFL Atlanta Falcons Playing Cards since I'm from Atlanta, but there are lots of others.) 
• I think a tiny USB car charger is potentially useful for most people...
• I am also intrigued by the Credit Card Size Survival Pocket Tool. Among other things it claims to include: 1) Can Opener 2) Knife Edge 3) Screwdriver 4) Ruler 5) Cap Opener...
• Do something nice by ordering an item that supports a cause. Ten Thousand Villages is a fair trade retailer with dozens of unique items for under $10.
• These silly file folders from Crate & Barrel won't fit in a stocking, but should bring a smile.

•  Visit One Hope Wines - While these wines exceed my dollar limit, they are worth mentioning for someone special. Half of the profits from each bottle are donated to charity. The site is very clear and specific about the amount of the donation - and you can even select your own charity to receive a portion.

Happy Holiday Shopping!

Carnival Birthday Party - Part 3: The Food

Suddenly my little backyard birthday party has almost 40 guests!

It's time for a reality check. This is a 5 year old's party.

I don't know why I thought I could get away with a few homemade cupcakes and a game or two.  After all, its not the 1970s anymore. I guess even my budget was "retro". I love this YouTube 70s birthday party clip.  This was what I mentally had in mind - very Brady Bunch. For that era this was probably a lavish party: they had themed plates & cups and a bakery cake. My mom baked all of our cakes and we ate off of plain white paper plates as far as I remember.

We've been to several spectacular birthday parties this month - one with pony rides and a petting zoo!  Another hired a costumed character to entertain and rented an inflatable bounce house. I am having the kids play simple party games.  I'm not interested in "keeping up" with anybody but I do realize that with kids come adults and siblings, all of whom need to eat at least a little something. When one of us goes to a party with Danielle we want to have a snack, some cake, a cold drink... 

I've given up on my $100 budget and am just trying to figure out how to keep it from getting wildly out of hand. This site cracked me up - its sort of a Party Planners Anonymous for over-the top party planning parents (which I suppose I now am.) I also found this site enlightening for average costs. Now I'm hoping to keep the budget under $200 since I have so many guests.

I still want to keep the food simple. I have to deal with a number of food allergies- dairy, gluten, egg & soy as well as one diabetic child and one vegetarian! In a weird way the food allergies are a blessing. Instead of having to provide a full meal we'll serve snacks: Ian's turkey corn dog nuggets and regular corn dogs, potato chips, veggies and dip, as well as  individual bags of cotton candy and popcorn. The little bags work out great for the kids, but cotton candy was expensive at nearly $1/bag. I'll make large batches of popcorn on the stove so the house will be filled with the scent of fresh, hot popcorn. I had lollipops left over from my birthday party a few months ago. Since candy stays fresh for 6 months I'll be able to set them out again for Danielle's party -add two gumballs machines from Dollar Tree and I have a buffet.

Then there's the birthday cake controversy. Danielle asked for cupcakes and that is something I can easily do at home. A dear friend taught me that frosting makes excellent spackle when your cakes lean and kids love it.

I'll bake egg free vanilla cupcakes (recipe follows). I had several failed attempts before I realized that gluten free, sugar free and egg free cupcakes were an impossibility for someone with my culinary ability.  See the photo...this is NOT the final batch based on the recipe I've included, I promise! I bought a few gluten free cupcakes from Whole Foods after this disaster.

I purchased 4 frozen gluten free cupcakes for less than the cost of the ingredients to bake my own. I've got cute circus animal cupcake toppers (leftover from a previous party) to insert in these to differentiate them from the others. I figure that the kids will never know who is eating the allergy-free cupcakes once they all have one on their plates.

Being from New England, I associate carnivals with Dels' frozen lemonade. I wanted to serve homemade frozen lemonade.  After trying several recipes I gave up (again) and bought Minute Maid frozen lemonades. We'll also provide small bottles of water. Since I'm feeling particularly fancy I've printed out some super cute, free water bottle labels , thanks to Hostess with the Mostess.

While I am having fun making and baking things for the party I can see how this could easily get out of control. Somebody stop me!

Egg-Free (Vegan) Vanilla Cupcakes*

• 1/2 cup butter (or coconut oil)
• 1 1/2 cups sugar
• 1 1/2 cups milk (or almond milk)
• 2 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 2 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 3 cups cake flour

Preheat oven to 350. Sift dry ingredients together, set aside. In mixer, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add vanilla to the measured out milk and add milk and flour in alternate batches beginning and ending with the flour. After ingredients are combined beat for about 1 minute on medium speed. Fill cupcake liners about 2/3 full and bake for approx. 20 minutes until centers are set and toothpick comes out clean.

* make this recipe sugar-free by using Splenda for Baking instead of sugar.

Carnival Birthday Party -Part 1: The Planning

Danielle has asked for a "Fall Festival" for her birthday party this year. I love carnivals so I'm totally on board. I enjoy having birthday parties at home because I like to create things for my kids. I consider it my gift to them. In fact, we typically don't buy them a present if they have a party.

For inspiration I've been reading "carnival birthday blogs."  I was stunned at the effort and expense some parents go to for their children's "at home" birthday parties. I'm not going to deny that I devote a fair amount of time to making things while the girls are asleep.

However, I don't have unlimited time to devote to this project.  One blogger claimed," ...my son’s second birthday; a Carnival Extraordinaire... took me a little more than six months of planning to coordinate everything..." Seriously?!?! That's a quarter of the little guy's life that she could have spent enjoying time with her child. My friends teased me for starting the planning six weeks in advance!

There are so many Carnival Party blogs out there it seems a bit silly to create another one. Unless, of course, you don't want to spend the equivalent of a small wedding on your child's birthday. In which case, read on! My favorite carnival party blog was called "Over the (Big) Top" - a party for a one year old with 54 children and a budget which had to have been in the thousands of dollars. WOW! What did she do for when he turned two?

Other blogging advice included tips such as "pick your child's outfit in advance so it doesn't clash with the decorations". A friend thought that was hysterical - so do I! I'll be lucky if Danielle's clothes match and she's got her shoes on the right feet.

I think many of these moms and dads might have forgotten that a birthday party should be fun for the kid. Worrying about their clothes for the photos seems a bit sad to me. I want to live in the moment, not just look at the photos afterward. I remember some wonderful birthday parties my mom pulled together for us - even though there are no pictures of them anywhere.

I don't want to spend a fortune. I'm not going to hire a caterer, a clown or even a professional photographer. Not having the money to rent a miniature train, build a ticket booth or rent a cotton candy machine, my options are more limited than most bloggers, but also more realistic.

In our area it costs an average of $300-400 to host a birthday party for 10-12 children and their parents at a location such as an indoor playground, a museum or the zoo. That's without the "extras" like balloons, goodie bags and cake - things most kids consider necessities. I want to host a party for half that - and for 17 kids and their parents. I also want goodie bags, balloons and food.

Needless to say, "do it yourself" is the key. There will be lots of photos of the various things I make throughout this blog!

Stay tuned for recipes and menu ideas as well as party decorations!

Preview of things to come...

Do The Math

I have a friend who teases me that I always "do the math." Its true. I do. I rarely think "oh, that's only $75 more a month." My mind immediately jumps to "that's an additional $900 a year."

When I was a kid my mother taught me to mentally add the cost of my groceries as I shopped. Back in the dark ages it was a lot easier because I figured out that the items averaged $1 a piece. All I had to do was keep a count and then I'd be able to estimate my total. Now, with a big bottle of laundry detergent costing almost $20 it's a lot harder. Still, I'm normally within about $5 of the total once everything is rung up.  I actually switched groceries stores because I estimated that the average cost of items was 20 cents less at one store. I realized that if I typically buy 100 items I'd save $20 a week (or over $1,000 a year.) No brainer.

Same thing with personal services. Around here a cut and color costs about $150. If I color it myself and get a trim at Great Clips I save $130 a month (more than $1500 a year.) No one even noticed when I made the switch - except the time that I accidentally bought the wrong brand, but that's a whole 'nother blog. I don't get a weekly mani/pedi because at $25 a week it's $1300 a year. Those three small changes saved us $3,800 a year - that's a nice vacation, the down payment on a new car, or who knows what else. 

Now if I could talk myself into giving up takeout food... A pizza each week costs more than $1,000 over the course of a year. A daily grande latte adds up to more than $900 a year - and at 190 calories each it's a good thing to drop from my routine.

I don't make any decision without mentally doing the math. I calculate a cost/benefit analysis almost automatically. Some things are definitely worth paying someone else to do. They are too complicated or too dangerous. Sometimes its just nice to have someone else take care of you, to pamper you. I just think its important to realize what you may be giving up in exchange. Personally, I'll take a week at the beach  over a weekly manicure any day.

It's a matter of looking at the big picture.

Can I sacrifice a moment's happiness or convenience for something in the future? Sometimes the answer is "no". Sometimes I want the overpriced cup of coffee or the quick dinner. Sometimes I need the help. Sometimes I just want to look and feel pretty. As long as I understand what I'm sacrificing, it's okay.

We live in a society where we all think we can "have it all." I'm not sure why we think that. My parents grew up at the tail end of The Great Depression and during World War II. I grew up hearing stories about backyard victory gardens and gas rationing tickets. I never expected to have it all. I'm happy to have "some". The nice thing about not having everything is that, just like when you were a child, when you get what you want it feels special. It gives little treats that Christmas morning feel.

Also, I realize that I have so much more than many people. I get to make the choice between luxuries rather than necessities. I'm not challenged with considering whether I should pay the electric bill or buy groceries. I understand that my desire to take an annual vacation is as much a luxury as getting regular spa treatments.

I'm not judging. We all make our own choices. I just think we should try to make informed decisions - you know, "do the math."

Trying to Travel

We plan to fly to Boston at the end of July. As anyone who has traveled with kids knows, this takes a little advanced prep. Our situation requires even more planning as we try to juggle one wheelchair, one stroller, carry on luggage and two kids. Fortunately Danielle now uses a booster seat so we don't have the nightmare of lugging a carseat as well.

We've taken the girls to New England and California in the past so both are experienced travelers. However, its been 18 months since we've been on a plane. For Danielle, that's a third of her lifetime. She really doesn't remember the process.

It helps to prepare her for new experiences by reading books. Books we'll read before the trip include The Noisy Airplane Ride and Going On A Plane . We have a beautiful board book that was Amanda's called Planes. The Noisy Airplane Ride is perfect for Danielle sho has a fear of unknown noises. It goes through each step of the flight, describing the noises you'll hear.

Danielle represents all of the challenges of travelling with a typical four year  old - she gets bored, restless and grumpy. She talks too loud on the plane or she wants to run through the airport. Or, worse, she wants to be carried. She's too big for a stroller now so I've bought her a special carry on of her own, Trunki. In theory a child should be able to ride on the Trunki - even be pulled through the airport if necessary.  It comes in various colors. She would have liked red, but I purchased blue due to a structural issue.

I chose the Terrence over the Ruby model because the red has two handles where the "seat" is. I couldn't envision Danielle sitting comfortably on those handles. I wanted to avoid ending up with one more piece of luggage for me or Kevin to carry. The Ruby is undeniably cuter, looking a bit like a ladybug. I've seen a cow model for sale on EBay. I think it would be great if Melissa & Doug made these 1) in more animal patterns and 2) for larger kids. Danielle is at the high end for this and we may only get one trip out of it as a ride on. Hopefully she will continue to use it as her carry on.

I'll pack a variety of toys and snacks to occupy her in the airport while we wait and on the plane. Toys will include Polly Pockets, an Olivia Carnival Play Set, ColorWonder Disney Princess Coloring Set and Dover Little Sticker books (Little Airport and Beach). Some are familiar, others are new. I'll open all of the new toys before I pack so that we're not fussing with packaging on the plane. You can't bring a wrapped gift in your carry on luggage, but I want to surprise her with some of these so I'll roll them into spare clothes. Maybe I can bring a few colored lunch bags and slip them inside without her noticing once we're onboard. I also know that the interior of the plane provides its own fun - light switches, headphones with music she can control, magazines to play "I Spy" with and, of course, barf bag puppets!

Danielle has inherited Amanda's Nintendo DS. She has one game of her own, Smart Girl PlayHouse. I bought a second SmartGirl game and her own headphones as as surprise.  I also ordered a car charger for the DS - and one for the IPad as well. That way they can entertain themselves during the long car rides between our families' houses. I like them to look out the windows and talk to us, but realistically we need a back up plan.

Right now I have no other special preparations for Danielle. I think that if she understands the process she'll enjoy it - and maybe, just maybe, we will too!

For my Listmania List go to Complete Packing

Fernbank Museum of Natural History

If you are in the Atlanta area Fernbank Museum is a great place to take the kids. Both of our girls love it -which given their varying ages and abilities is rare. It's a surprisingly good place to take kids with disabilities. While we were there today we noticed three other families with children with special needs so this isn't a big secret - or if it is, it shouldn't be.

The Museum is very accessible. There is excellent disabled parking as well as curb cuts and ramps around the exterior. The only failing I've found is the lack of an automatic door so maneuvering a wheelchair actually into the building is tricky.

The museum is three stories tall, focused around a soaring central atrium which is filled with dinosaur skeletons. There are stairs between the floors and a (very slow) elevator for visitors with strollers or mobility impairments.

The permanent exhibits are interesting and include plenty of hands on exploration for kids in the super-cool new NatureQuest and the older Sensing Nature gallery, both on the third floor.

I'm particularly impressed with how accessible they made NatureQuest. The former children's exploration rooms had very little for a child with physical limitations to do. The new center, while it does have inaccessible areas like a crawling tunnel and a tree house, is well thought out including a ramp up to the "archaeological dig site" and pathways wide enough for a wheelchair. The exhibits are intended for young children so they are also at an ideal height for wheelchair viewing.

As funny as it sounds, the nicest bathrooms are also on the third floor. While I can't vouch for the Men's Rooms, the third floor Women's Room near NatureQuest has a nice private area for nursing, including a comfortable glider chair and a curtain for privacy. There are also good single bathrooms at the other end of the floor - perfect for families or companion use.

NatureQuest

The girls playing together in the Sensing Nature gallery

Danielle can spend hours looking at the exhibits, playing at NatureQuest or on the outside patio, running on the front lawn...Fernbank has an IMAX movie theater which, while it makes me nauseous, Amanda loves. Fortunately if she gets restless exploring the museum Kevin is usually willing to sit through the movie with her.  

Admission isn't cheap - a family of four will pay $66 to get in. However, annual membership is under $100 and, from our perspective well worth it. One of the nicest features of being members is not only can we go as often as we like for free, the membership is good for 2 adults and 4 children. If I go alone with the girls I can invite a friend and her children to come along as our guests for free. This gives me one more adult to watch the kids as well as a companion for one or both of them. And I look really generous in the process!

 

Seriously, who wouldn't want to stand under a T-Rex?