Gift Suggestions for a Developmentally Delayed Young Adult, Part 2

If you can't think of things to give, consider giving the person an experience.


Oddly, Amanda doesn't sit through movies, but many of her friends enjoy them. A movie gift certificate might make an excellent gift.

For Amanda's friend that loves Elmo tickets to Sesame Street Live would be a thrill. For a Thomas-lover, consider tickets to the touring stage show or a Day Out with Thomas where they can visit and ride on the "real" Thomas. These are all things we have taken Amanda to and she has enjoyed very much.

Some of Amanda's best gifts have been experiences. When she was 7 she got tickets to see The Wiggles Live. When she was 9 she got tickets to see Disney on Ice. It was High School Musical so she was thrilled.  Disney also typically has a touring show of some sort featuring familiar characters.  If the person is Christian, they might enjoy seeing the VeggieTales live. You can also try Hit Entertainment's franchises like Barney, Fireman Sam, Bob the Builder, Angelina Ballerina - you'd be amazed how many touring stage shows there are! Most people love to get out and see something new.

We've noticed that Amanda does better with shows that appear to be cartoons (i.e., people in big animal costumes or puppets.) She is less patient with live actors. As long as there is enough stimulus for Amanda she is completely engaged in live performances. She does tend to think that intermission means the end of the show, but other than that she responds really well to shows with a lot of music.  She would NOT sit through The Nutcracker, however, or a symphony.

This is the time to consider the person's intellectual and emotional development. Stop and ask yourself before you buy tickets, would a typical three year old (or whatever the person's developmental age is) enjoy this? be able to sit through it? understand it? If the answer to ANY of those questions is "no" then keep looking for ideas.

Options to consider include:

• the circus
• local puppet shows
• high school productions of familiar stories (Cinderella, Little Mermaid, etc.)

Some people might like to go out to eat, but not all of them. Amanda likes to eat at the food court at the mall because she likes the stimulus, but eating at a sit-down restaurant is not her idea of fun. If you decide to give a gift card to a restaurant make sure that it is one the person likes and will enjoy. As odd as it sounds, McDonald's or Burger King gift cards might be better than a "nice" restaurant
for an adult with developmental delays. Amanda thinks going to the McDonalds drive-thru is a big treat!

I have two suggestions if you are considering giving an experience rather than a physical gift.

1) Have something symbolizing the experience for the person to unwrap. Tickets and notes can be too abstract for some people with special needs to understand. For example, if you are giving tickets to Disney on Ice, then wrap up a small Disney figure, stuffed animal or inexpensive book with the tickets so they can make the connection.

2) Make sure there is someone to go to the event with the person. In an ideal world the gift giver would accompany the recipient, but that's not always possible. If you can't go, make sure that the person has a guest to accompany them, to help them negotiate the venue, etc. Be sure to include a ticket for the chaperone!

Lastly, don't overlook family memberships as gifts. In the past Amanda has been given a family membership (or an Individual +1) that allowed us to go places that we might not have otherwise tried. Try to think of a place that might have special appeal to the recipient.  Think beyond the surface. You might not think a Science Museum would be a good destination, when in fact, they often offer a lot of hands on experiences which are ideal for individuals with developmental disabilities. People with this type of disability often enjoy tactile experiences, cause and effect and interactive displays.

Art museums, historical sites, and history museums might not be the best choices. However, you might have an art museum near you with an excellent kids area, creative programming or something else that would make it especially appealing. Amanda adored Fernbank Museum of Natural History in Atlanta because it had a good children's area and an IMAX. I know another young woman with mild special needs who loves creating art. A gift certificate to a paint you own pottery place or an art museum would be her dream gift.

Make sure that you take a little time to read through the various programs and exhibits before you buy a membership. Look for words like "hands on", interactive", "family-friendly." Also be sure to check accessibility! To our surprise even in this era of ADA access, not all public spaces are accessible. A lovely local museum in Providence is housed in an antique building - you have to be able to climb multiple steps to enter - so it's off our list. As are many of the historical sites around New England.

Gift memberships to the Georgia Aquarium and Stone Mountain when we lived in Atlanta created some of our favorite family memories.Amanda loved being rolled through the tunnel inside Aquarium and riding the train at Stone Mountain. Honestly, if you'd asked me if she would have enjoyed a Confederate Memorial, I would have answered with an unequivocal, "NO", yet it turned out to be a place we went over and over.

One of the first things we did when we moved to New England was purchase a family membership to Mystic Aquarium. Amanda loves being out, seeing new sites and familiar old ones. I hope that someone gives her a membership to another are attraction for Christmas so we can start building new memories in our new home.