Carnival Birthday Party - Part 3: The Food

Suddenly my little backyard birthday party has almost 40 guests!

It's time for a reality check. This is a 5 year old's party.

I don't know why I thought I could get away with a few homemade cupcakes and a game or two.  After all, its not the 1970s anymore. I guess even my budget was "retro". I love this YouTube 70s birthday party clip.  This was what I mentally had in mind - very Brady Bunch. For that era this was probably a lavish party: they had themed plates & cups and a bakery cake. My mom baked all of our cakes and we ate off of plain white paper plates as far as I remember.

We've been to several spectacular birthday parties this month - one with pony rides and a petting zoo!  Another hired a costumed character to entertain and rented an inflatable bounce house. I am having the kids play simple party games.  I'm not interested in "keeping up" with anybody but I do realize that with kids come adults and siblings, all of whom need to eat at least a little something. When one of us goes to a party with Danielle we want to have a snack, some cake, a cold drink... 

I've given up on my $100 budget and am just trying to figure out how to keep it from getting wildly out of hand. This site cracked me up - its sort of a Party Planners Anonymous for over-the top party planning parents (which I suppose I now am.) I also found this site enlightening for average costs. Now I'm hoping to keep the budget under $200 since I have so many guests.

I still want to keep the food simple. I have to deal with a number of food allergies- dairy, gluten, egg & soy as well as one diabetic child and one vegetarian! In a weird way the food allergies are a blessing. Instead of having to provide a full meal we'll serve snacks: Ian's turkey corn dog nuggets and regular corn dogs, potato chips, veggies and dip, as well as  individual bags of cotton candy and popcorn. The little bags work out great for the kids, but cotton candy was expensive at nearly $1/bag. I'll make large batches of popcorn on the stove so the house will be filled with the scent of fresh, hot popcorn. I had lollipops left over from my birthday party a few months ago. Since candy stays fresh for 6 months I'll be able to set them out again for Danielle's party -add two gumballs machines from Dollar Tree and I have a buffet.

Then there's the birthday cake controversy. Danielle asked for cupcakes and that is something I can easily do at home. A dear friend taught me that frosting makes excellent spackle when your cakes lean and kids love it.

I'll bake egg free vanilla cupcakes (recipe follows). I had several failed attempts before I realized that gluten free, sugar free and egg free cupcakes were an impossibility for someone with my culinary ability.  See the photo...this is NOT the final batch based on the recipe I've included, I promise! I bought a few gluten free cupcakes from Whole Foods after this disaster.

I purchased 4 frozen gluten free cupcakes for less than the cost of the ingredients to bake my own. I've got cute circus animal cupcake toppers (leftover from a previous party) to insert in these to differentiate them from the others. I figure that the kids will never know who is eating the allergy-free cupcakes once they all have one on their plates.

Being from New England, I associate carnivals with Dels' frozen lemonade. I wanted to serve homemade frozen lemonade.  After trying several recipes I gave up (again) and bought Minute Maid frozen lemonades. We'll also provide small bottles of water. Since I'm feeling particularly fancy I've printed out some super cute, free water bottle labels , thanks to Hostess with the Mostess.

While I am having fun making and baking things for the party I can see how this could easily get out of control. Somebody stop me!

Egg-Free (Vegan) Vanilla Cupcakes*

• 1/2 cup butter (or coconut oil)
• 1 1/2 cups sugar
• 1 1/2 cups milk (or almond milk)
• 2 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 2 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 3 cups cake flour

Preheat oven to 350. Sift dry ingredients together, set aside. In mixer, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add vanilla to the measured out milk and add milk and flour in alternate batches beginning and ending with the flour. After ingredients are combined beat for about 1 minute on medium speed. Fill cupcake liners about 2/3 full and bake for approx. 20 minutes until centers are set and toothpick comes out clean.

* make this recipe sugar-free by using Splenda for Baking instead of sugar.

Carnival Birthday Party - Part 2: The Decorations & Games

I love decorations. Streamers, balloons and a pretty table go a long way toward setting the stage for a theme party. I'm lucky that both of my girls have November birthdays so my decorations can often do double duty for both parties.

Kids have great imaginations. My goal is to give them a jumping off point to make their own fun, rather than to orchestrate every minute of the party. My starting point for the carnival decorations is a fabric circus tent from Discount School Supply that we already had in the play room.

I've had a great time making decorations. I grew up with my Mom covering the living room floor with signs that she was painting for various political campaigns. Painting signs for the game stations seemed like a no brainer to me. I started with 10 sheets of foam board from Dollar Tree. The first few signs were pretty pathetic - until I discovered the paint was not my friend. As soon as I switched Danielle's colored markers my signs improved dramatically. Of course I've had to live with hearing,"Mommy, why do you keep taking my markers without asking?"

I handmade a sign for each of the games as well as one for prizes and one for treats. I tried to copy signs that I found online. I also printed out coloring pages and used them for graphic elements on the signs. I admit that I see the irony in making a bunch of signs for kids that are too young to read. I hope the pictures will help...

Some of the blogs I read actually hired graphic artists to design custom signs, invitations, water bottle wrappers and favors! I received a $20 Shutterfly certificate when I ordered Amanda's school pictures from Lifetouch so I was able to create custom photo invitations and several poster sized prints (I lucked into a half price sale)  for free!

I used Microsoft Publisher to create a really cool sign welcoming party guests.  I used a Fourth of July template and added my own photo and text. I'm thrilled with how it came out - it took less than 5 minutes and I printed it through Shutterfly. Buy the supplies, print, cut and paste and you look like one of the parents on TLC's "Outrageous Kid Parties."

Since I've been told this whole idea is "delightfully retro" I've decided to embrace the old school party games I grew up on. None of these are unique - or difficult to find or assemble... but they are all fun!

 Horseshoes (had on hand)
 Bowling
 Penny Pitch (made)
 Fishing Game
 Bean Bag Toss (made)
 Photo Booth or Board (made)
 Temporary Tattoos

The things I've made:
I made the Penny Pitch by gluing a 4 by 3 grid of decorative shapes to sheet of foam board and painting a border around the edges. The object is for the kids to toss pennies on to the shapes to earn a prize or ticket.

The Bean Bag Toss we made

We made a Bean Bag Toss from a sheet of foam board with three large holes cut into it. Danielle and I had fun decorating the surface with paper leaves. I used a dowel to prop it up at an angle, but the holes were  small for the kids when we practiced. We added three brightly colored plastic trash baskets from Dollar Tree - everyone's a winner when you have a big target!

We made colorful beanbags from felt and fabric scraps. I don't have a sewing machine. In fact, I typically rely on the dry cleaners to replace buttons on Kevin's shirts. So hand sewing anything - even something as small as a bean bag was a big deal for me. Danielle helped cut the fabric, fill them with beans and sew them closed. She did a great job! Two are shaped like fall leaves, in case you couldn't tell. I love that we're having so much fun getting ready for her party together.

My friend's father very kindly offered to make a wooden Photo Op board that the kids can peek through for pictures. If I get it in time I'll paint it to look like a scarecrow. I will use some straw and fabric leaves to make it a little 3D.

To decorate the table I cut triangles from brightly colored felt we had on hand and glued them along a piece of twine around various glass containers so that they looked like circus pennants. I used washable school glue so that after the party these can go back to being plain glass dishes.

I'll use red, yellow and blue solid colored plastic table cloths. They came from (you guessed it) Dollar Tree. Various fabric remnants will dress up the tables. The games and decorations that I've made myself cost about $25.

Now for the things that I've had to buy:
I bought temporary Tattoos from Dollar Tree.The Duck Fishing game came from Party City. I ordered a Candy Corn Bowling set from Oriental Trading. I found a $5 Ferris wheel center piece at Hobby Lobby. Dollar Tree was great for streamers, plastic pennants, foam board, prizes and tickets.  You can download tickets at http://images.birthdayinabox.com/partyplanning/carnival_ticket.pdf. 

I hit Michael's when they were having a 30 cent clearance sale. My biggest score was a penny item - a Circus cake topper. How cool! I got beach balls, more party favors, plates and napkins for less than $10. Always check Hobby Lobby and Michaels websites for coupons before shopping. You can normally get 40-50% off one item - sometimes Michaels has 25% off your entire purchase including sale items!

Instead of traditional goodie bags I've made the radical decision to create a Prize Table where the children can trade tickets for prizes. Honestly I did this because when I invited 9 children to the party I expected 9 children... not the 9 children and 8 siblings who responded. However, is also means that Danielle is eligible for prizes - leaving me with a total of 18 kids needing prizes.

Having a birthday right after Halloween means that I can't fall back on candy as a party favor. Most of the kids still have leftover candy at home. Instead I picked little flashlights, fairy wands, helicopter fliers, tops, whistles, rings and tiny telescopes.  I'll give each child 5 tickets to trade for prizes. Any left overs I'll use for pinata fillers in the future.

Tragically I'm nearly at my $100 budget despite my hard work and I haven't purchased any carnival themed food yet. I'm not quite sure where I went wrong... I probably shouldn't have bothered with a theme at all and just let them run around the yard and play.

For more budget party planning ideas please go to http://www.birthdayinabox.com/parties-under-100.asp

Carnival Birthday Party -Part 1: The Planning

Danielle has asked for a "Fall Festival" for her birthday party this year. I love carnivals so I'm totally on board. I enjoy having birthday parties at home because I like to create things for my kids. I consider it my gift to them. In fact, we typically don't buy them a present if they have a party.

For inspiration I've been reading "carnival birthday blogs."  I was stunned at the effort and expense some parents go to for their children's "at home" birthday parties. I'm not going to deny that I devote a fair amount of time to making things while the girls are asleep.

However, I don't have unlimited time to devote to this project.  One blogger claimed," ...my son’s second birthday; a Carnival Extraordinaire... took me a little more than six months of planning to coordinate everything..." Seriously?!?! That's a quarter of the little guy's life that she could have spent enjoying time with her child. My friends teased me for starting the planning six weeks in advance!

There are so many Carnival Party blogs out there it seems a bit silly to create another one. Unless, of course, you don't want to spend the equivalent of a small wedding on your child's birthday. In which case, read on! My favorite carnival party blog was called "Over the (Big) Top" - a party for a one year old with 54 children and a budget which had to have been in the thousands of dollars. WOW! What did she do for when he turned two?

Other blogging advice included tips such as "pick your child's outfit in advance so it doesn't clash with the decorations". A friend thought that was hysterical - so do I! I'll be lucky if Danielle's clothes match and she's got her shoes on the right feet.

I think many of these moms and dads might have forgotten that a birthday party should be fun for the kid. Worrying about their clothes for the photos seems a bit sad to me. I want to live in the moment, not just look at the photos afterward. I remember some wonderful birthday parties my mom pulled together for us - even though there are no pictures of them anywhere.

I don't want to spend a fortune. I'm not going to hire a caterer, a clown or even a professional photographer. Not having the money to rent a miniature train, build a ticket booth or rent a cotton candy machine, my options are more limited than most bloggers, but also more realistic.

In our area it costs an average of $300-400 to host a birthday party for 10-12 children and their parents at a location such as an indoor playground, a museum or the zoo. That's without the "extras" like balloons, goodie bags and cake - things most kids consider necessities. I want to host a party for half that - and for 17 kids and their parents. I also want goodie bags, balloons and food.

Needless to say, "do it yourself" is the key. There will be lots of photos of the various things I make throughout this blog!

Stay tuned for recipes and menu ideas as well as party decorations!

Preview of things to come...

30 Days in the Life of a Parent of a Child with Special Needs

Before I had a child with special needs I'd see parents with a disabled child and think, "oh, how hard for them." I had no idea how hard it really was. All I thought about was the emotional impact of raising a child with a host of special needs and to a lesser extent, the physical barriers for children in wheelchairs.

I never thought about the variety of equipment required from ramps to nebulizers - or who pays for that equipment and the related medical bills. Most people assume that there is a huge bundle of state and federal money helping to support these children. Not so. We have "supplemental" Medicaid that pays for very few of Amanda's needs. We are lucky to have good health insurance, but there are still many things that we have to pay for privately (incontinence supplies, copayments and emergency room fees, home modifications like ramps, shower chairs, etc.)

I never realized that its impossible for the parents to get a babysitter and go to a movie or out to dinner. If I want to go out I need to hire a certified nursing assistant for respite care at 2-3 times the cost of a typical babysitter.

I never thought about the doctors visits, surgeries and trips to the emergency room. I never wondered who lifts the child in and out of bed, the bathtub, the car... or what happens when that child becomes a teenager or an adult.

Managing Amanda's medical conditions feels like a full time job some days. I have to schedule doctors appointments, fill out forms & drive to appointments.  I make phone calls and do a lot of paperwork as well as juggling carpool, cooking, cleaning, laundry, banking and grocery shopping. In addition to trying to keep Amanda healthy and happy I have to balance things so Danielle can have a typical childhood, despite having to spend days playing quietly in a hospital room at times.  This was our past 30 days:

• Day 1:  Endocrinology appointment for A. (Review of hormone-producing glands that control basic body functions such as metabolism, growth -  in our case, bone growth and quality). Blood is drawn for testing. Sent home with cup for urine sample (ha ha - like that is going to happen since she wears diapers.)

•  Day 2: Pulmonologist (respiratory care) appointment for A to determine whether there is any lasting impact from her collapsed lung. Art class for D.

• Day 3:  Schedule bone density scan for A at Children's Hospital. Get Rx from Orthopedic surgeon for Amanda to resume physical therapy. Respite worker calls to say she will be half an hour late. Kevin has to work from home to watch Amanda so D can go to ballet.
• Day 4: Mail Appeal for Medicaid Denial. The original application contained nearly 100 pages of forms and doctor's reports. Despite containing 17 diagnoses, it was denied because the letter from her psychologist stating that she is mentally retarded and autistic was missing.

•  Day 7: Received a call at 8:20 AM - Amanda has had a grand mal seizure. Meet Ambulance at school and ride to Children's Hospital Emergency Room. Released after a few hours of observation. Respite worker is a no show. Department of Family & Children's Services representative appears at the house at 5 PM.

• Day 8: Make appointment with Neurologist for A. Will need to schedule MRI & EEG.Receive Seizure Action Plan paperwork from school.  Respite worker officially quits. Art class for D.

• Day 9: Try to track down seizure medication Rx sent by ER to wrong pharmacy. Ballet for D - a friend takes her for me so I can be home for Amanda.

• Day 12: Take Danielle to birthday party.

• Day 13: Find prescription! Need to wait for them to order the meds. Drop off Seizure Action Plan and Authorization for Physical Therapy at school for Primary Care Physician's signature.

• Day 14: New respite worker starts (6 hours a week)

• Day 15: Schedule Pulmonary Sleep Study for next month. Schedule Community Service review.   Pick up Seizure medications and PCP authorizations. Art class for D.

• Day 16: Drive to PCP's office to pick up signed Seizure Action Plan and PT authorization. Schedule appointment with Orthotics for leg braces. New respite worker cancels one hour before she is scheduled to arrive. Kevin has to work from home - again - to watch Amanda so D can go to ballet.

• Day 20: Bone Density scan outpatient procedure in the morning. Amanda thrusts to the side so hard while the nurse is inserting her IV that she bends the frame of her wheelchair. Amanda suffers three separate episodes of apnea, hypoxia and cyanosis. Test is cancelled. Review by Community Service Case Worker in the afternoon. Leave messages for Endocrinologist to reschedule test under general anesthesia and with Pulmonologist. Email PCP regarding referral to Craniofacial Clinic.

• Day 21: Picture day at school for Amanda. Complete intake paperwork for Neurology practice. Third respite worker this month starts...I'm starting to feel like I must be a real bitch to work for.

•  Day 22: D to Art

• Day 23: D to ballet

• Day 24: Third respite worker resigns - seriously!?! I'm not even asking them to work anymore - just to sit in the room with Amanda so I can get some housework done or make dinner.  Drive to PCP to pick up paperwork needed for physical therapy at school.

• Day 25: Recived a certified letter stating that it is the "FINAL TECHNICAL DENIAL" for Medicaid. Start scrambling to create more evidence of Amanda's need for services. Enlist the help of her teachers, therapists and aides.

• Day 26: D to birthday party. Spent two hours providing detailed answers to Parent Physical Therapy Questionnaire. Final answer was 6 pages.

• Day 29: Neurologist Appointment. Amanda has two focal seizures during the appointment. Dr. schedules more blood tests, EEG and an MRI. We have to start tracking episodes of staring seizures at home and at school.

• Day 30: Schedule MRI & EEG

What will the next 30 days hold? Well, on Monday Amanda has to go for blood work and an EEG. I know I'll be attending three birthday parties with Danielle and an MRI as well as overnight sleep study at the hospital with Amanda...Poor Amanda, no one ever invites her to a party.