Peach or Orange?

 Parenting a Special Needs Child

A bit of a cheat - Written when Amanda was only 2 years old...

The other day at lunch my neighbor laid several Popsicles in front of her two year old daughter. “Purple, orange, red, blue,” she recited as she set them down. Her daughter responded, “Purple, orange, red, blue.” My friend beamed and asked “which do you want?”

At our neighborhood play group I hear the mothers of typical children quizzing them all the time. “Count my fingers.” “Which is green?” Each competing with the other to prove their child is smartest. Why is it that parents of typical children all believe that their children are geniuses?

My two-year old daughter’s biggest accomplishment recently has been to eat a peach. To actually pick it up in her hands and take bites. We were so excited that we videotaped it.

This is the first time I’ve realized that having an atypical child is a gift. We’ve accepted Amanda’s limits. I don’t expect her to go to Harvard or compete in the Olympics. I don’t even expect her to show off in front of the neighbors. I’ve come to understand what most parents don’t realize until their children are much older. That my child was born her own person with her own strengths and weaknesses. That little I do can force her to excel in the areas I choose. My neighbors may be in for a rude awakening when they discover that their typical children are just that -- typical.

I like having an exceptional child. She’s freed me from the stress associated with competing with other children her age. We’re still waiting for the big milestones like first words and first steps, but until then we celebrate each small success. We don’t let the little steps slip by unnoticed like most parents. After all, the first bite of a ripe, sun-warmed peach really is the sweetest.

By the way, the little girl picked up the grape Popsicle and proudly waved it in the air yelling, "orange!"

Amanda when she was about 3 years old